I'm Fondu-ing It

It's really not cool to double book yourself on a friday night.

Last night I was eating from 6:30 to midnight. 2 birthday/dinner parties in one night.

I thought I could do it I really did. But come midnight I thought I was going to hurl all over the car.

DID YOU KNOW?: During World War II, Russians used dogs strapped with explosives to blow up German tanks. They trained the dogs to associate the tanks with food and ended up destroying about 25 German tanks using this method.

Did You Lick The Poster?.

So a co-worker of mine has come to believe that she is being poisoned by an employee of ours. A strange accusation, yes, but when i confronted the alleged suspect about it today she did get a naughty grin on her face and was nodding her head yes.

The moral of this story: dont' EVER take candy from a person with the last name Deathrage...true story.

In other news:

I had a really bad day yesterday, i'm just a little emotional. perhaps i should try something else when poisioning my co-workers.

UPDATE!!!:

Apparently the girls here at work are all upset because My co-worker got the last of the TROY posters. NOW EVERYONE IS A SUSPECT!!!!

Palp-A-Tation...

so i'm reading this guy's blog and the discussion is things that you eat that grosses everyone out, and there are some really really weird things on there, but all i can think about is this one time a friend of mine made "lasagne" with cottage cheese instead of ricotta and cheddar cheese instead of mozerella. It's more of someting i ate and not something i eat. Not something that grossed everyone else out, but just grossed me out.

maybe i didn't get the question.

OH YEAH...I'm going to a cadavar lab in a few short weeks...i'll let you know how it goes!!

Don't ever give pork green chili to Muslims

so i've come to learn today that we shouldn't kill wasps 'cause apparently they eat mosquitoes. and we all know how important that is with this WestNile nastiness still going on and stuff. Wasps are apparently our friends and we shouldn't kill them...ok?

So i was hanging out with some actors last night, not like people who are in drama classes or anything like that but real ACTORS. that's right! so we're out and about having drinks and it was so weird sitting at a table with all these people being all loud, trying to be the funniest, interrupting each other, over reacting and vying to be the center of attention...so i fit in just perfectly.

DID YOU KNOW?...
apparently all the rage is soon going to be acrylic toenails?!
no seriously, a friend of mine turned me onto this trend last night. at first i thought it was just another freakish beauty trend, but lo and behold, there's more!!!
some lady came into her shop (er, salon) and had a big toe "issue". she had some infection that consumed the middle section of her big toe and all this poor gal was left with was just a little toenail on each side with a big ol' island of skin in the middle. after much sculpting (and blood, sweat and tears i'm assuming) this sad dejected lady was all in a fluff because she could now wear sandals in the summer...it's not just beauty people, it's changing lives...
one toenail at a time.

FUN WITH FAKE SKIN!!
so here's a fun game you can play with your co-workers.

item's needed:
1 workplace
1 bottle of glue
1 co-worker with a germ/foot/dead skin phobia

do you remember when you were a kid and you put elmer's glue all over your hand and let it dry and then would peel off the big hand shaped glue sheet? it's even more fun when you make a ton of them and leave them all over your co-workers work space...notebooks, in-boxes, phone receivers, pen jar.

Next week FUN WITH BABY SPITTLE!!

"Oh Johnny Five!..."

OK, so this is funny:

Go to google and type in "Weapons of Mass Destruction" and click on "I'm Feeling Lucky" (which I usually am anyway)

Then read the error message that comes up.

in other news:

I never knew that so many people were offended by mayonaise. go fig!

(some of today's blog is brought to you in part by Mr. Atlantapants [you know who you are])

"we got spirit...YES WE DO!"

So i've had a revelation...

i'm going to start writing. for a long time i thought i had nothing to say, but now i think i do. (thanks margaret) so i'll be going into this whole big cathartic process of putting down my "statement" somehow. i think it's going to be pretty good. then again a million monkeys couldn't be wrong...could they?

Also today my physiology teacher told me that i should think about getting into teaching.

that's an odd statement.

i'm trying to figure out what i could exactly teach, here's my thoughts:

Reality tv 101
Reality tv 201

Celebrity Gossip 101

How to get away with anything by saying "but you didn't hear that from me" 101
That is a complimentary class to...
Loudmouth 101

how to find the perfect unavailable wo/man and be happy with it 101 (evening classes only)

Krispy Kreme...friend or foe? 101

oh i know, i know! i kid...it is an entertaining thought though. imagine me...a teacher! HA!

ok...so here i am again...

dunno what i'm going to talk about....or maybe 'aboot'...i love 'aboot'. don't you think 'aboot' is great? sometimes i wish i was from canada so i could say 'aboot':
"hey, buddy how's it goin'?"
"it's goin' good, do you know what time it is?"
"yeah, buddy, it's 'aboot' 3"

see, isn't that great...then of course that'd mean i'd have to be from canada.

come to think about it, i'l stick to 'about'

-peace out

p.s. - i love the word cankle too